I’m not dead. 

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July 25, 2017 by hallyrh

Nope. Over the past few weeks I was (quite!) busy trying to get settled with everyday life in England.

But today, I have enough time to sit on my bum – or more like curl up like a cat in an armchair, all bundled in a blanket at noontime with “monthly cramps” –  and write.

To start with, my other remaining single BFF back home who went on a solo soul-searching birthday trip to Cebu very recently, has gotten herself a girlfriend. And while I’m all happy, ecstatic, proud, throwing up rainbows (no pun intended), and cheering her on like a rabid sports fan, I also died a little inside. Haha. She was, and let me put this in italics, the only remaining single BFF. I always thought we were going to be like one of those cool, single, BFF grandmas in Star Cinema rom-coms who gave all the good, epiphany-provoking advice. Well, dream shattered. Haha.

Kidding aside. I’m happy for my utol. She deserves it. I’m glad she finally has someone to be completely garage-indie-art-museum-existential-crisis-lomo-photos hispter with.

I have other single friends anyway. Like my old work buddies whom I videochat with on an other-nightly basis. Haha.


England has been kind to me. I have met, and am continuing to meet, fellow Pinoys who have been living here for years. 

Work has honestly been tough. I managed to pick one of the busiest wards in the entire hospital. My work experience back home is pretty much the polar opposite of my current one – imagine jumping from very sick newborn babies to confused, poorly elderly patients. Not even a transition period. Haha. When I get my pin – or if I get my pin, that is – I’m gonna have to do some serious thinking, about whether I want to keep up with adult medical cases or go back to what I am actually more experienced at. 

But like I used to say, I want to gain expertise in another field. Nursing is varied. I can choose to focus on a single skill set for the rest of my career, or I can explore other areas and gain more experiences. It’s going to be like shitting bricks – difficult and painful – but it can help me grow, right? Stupid and cliché as that may sound? Wouldn’t it be awesome to be able to tell people that you’ve worked for 5 years in the NICU, 2 years in the ward, 2 years in the ICU, and so on? Of course that could also lead people to think you’re an unstable employee but if you have pristine records in each of your work areas, then that is basically like crack for your self-esteem right?

I lived alone in this Trust-provided flat for about 3 weeks. I didn’t have problems being solo, really. Being an only child helped. Sometimes I would go to the Town Center by myself to buy something important, like laundry detergent, and then come back home via the 2C bus carrying bags of things I do not even need but nonetheless make me happy. Like bath products. (So when my mother asked about my remaining pocket money, I had to discreetly manipulate the direction of the conversation. Haha!)

I had awkward run-ins with people who lived in the flat during my first 3 weeks. At one point I saw a lady walk out of Room 1 wearing nothing but a towel, which seriously startled me because back then I could’ve sworn she was not the woman living in there before. And then I came to realize these people living in the flat just come and go. They don’t live here for the long term. I myself have to leave after a couple of months.

Three weeks later, my fellow Pinoys arrived. Finally! Actually conversing with people in my native tongue after a day of work! Eating at a dining table together like a small pseudo-family, just talking about anything that came up! Watching movies! Trips to the Town Center! Filipino parties! Some noise! Music! Homemade dinners! Carol belting out high notes in Room 2! Lois giggling over Korean boyband BTS in Room 1! Finally some normalcyyyyy!

Sarah’s coming on the 3rd of next month and we’re stoked, cause she will be completing our 4-(wo)man cell. Around September, we’re going to rent the property of one of our fellow Pinoys here in Blackpool, which we are greatly thankful for, because she’s leaving her place fully furnished for us. I hope everything will work out smoothly. I can’t wait to start nesting into an actual house and put up pictures of my family in the room and display my toiletries freely along the tub (plus, scented candles! 😍). And trying out gardening! Maybe I have a green thumb? I’ve never grown anything before so I don’t actually know.

Well! That’s all I can prattle about for now, I guess! First salary coming up in 2 days! I’m all kinds of stoked!


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I'm not lost but I haven't been found either.

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